We need to talk. I’ll be honest with you--recent experiences have left me ashamed to number myself among your ranks. The behavior I have seen is appalling. I feel like we’ve lost touch with what rock ‘n’ roll is and what our role as an audience should be at a concert. And that makes me sad.

    Here’s the deal:  rock ‘n’ roll is an inherently physical means of artistic expression. You know this. One of the major differences between listening to a Mozart violin concerto and listening to “Kashmir” is that the former inspires a static, esoteric listening experience while the latter makes you want to get up and bang your head to the beat. And that, my friends, is exactly what you should do--especially at a rock concert.

    You see, rock concerts are social events, meaning that the audience participation is essential for them to work properly. Maybe we have a hard time understanding this because we’re always listening to music in the isolated world of our earbuds and have thus divorced the concept of social interaction from our experience of music. But rock concerts are categorically different experiences from listening to an iPod—experiences that require standing up, dancing, singing along, and interacting with fellow audience members. Unfortunately, I have noticed a lack of such behavior and even hostility toward it.

Two years ago at a U2 concert, several aged audience members petitioned me to sit my buttocks (I think they used a different word) back down in my seat after I had stood up to welcome the band’s arrival onstage. Since then, I have encountered similar requests from audience members over 40 at other concerts I have attended. Now, hear me out, I am not picking on old people. Seriously, I welcome your presence at any concert I attend. Since rock concerts are social events, they function to bring people from different backgrounds together. Having someone from a different generation beside me reinforces my connection with the culture at large and thus combats iPod isolationism. And I understand that standing up for the whole concert might not be possible for your less-than-youthful body. I don’t look down on you for sitting down to rest.

But please, understand when you purchase your ticket that, as I have said, rock concerts involve physical participation, and the people in front of you WILL stand up once the show starts. And also know that the very nature of rock music will automatically cancel out any angry-father/mother requests you may make of those around you. When those unkind fans tried to stifle my fun at the U2 concert, the message of righteous rebellion coming from Edge’s guitar and Larry’s drums were much more convincing, not to mention louder, than the grumpy groanings coming from behind me. Rock music is rebellious. So if you act like The Man, expect to be rebelled against.

The angry over-the-hill concertgoer, however, is not the chief of sinners. He/she has perhaps forgotten the youthful euphoria that is rock ‘n’ roll’s aim, so his/her behavior is almost excusable. What I find absolutely inexcusable is the refusal to participate exhibited by hip-looking late teens and twenty-somethings who insist on looking “cool” instead of participating with the rest of us.

When I saw Wilco play at the Ryman on March 2, I was shocked to see so many people my age stoically sitting in their seats in the balcony throughout the entire show. Seated behind me, for example, was the perfect hipster gentleman wearing the requisite pearl-snap shirt and sporting glasses that would make Rivers Cuomo jealous. He sat in his seats with his arms crossed throughout the entire concert. Not even the infectious “Pot Kettle Black” could stir this music expert from his self-imposed stasis.

People, this is not acceptable. Unless you have a physical disability, you should be on your feet pumping your fist to the beat. I know you like what you’re hearing because you wouldn’t have paid $40 to see it if you didn’t. I guess no one has ever told you this, so let me:  it is OK for you to act like you are having a good time and physically express the joy the music makes you feel. You can’t be happy sitting there on your hands trying to look sophisticated. God knows I look like an idiot when I flail my scrawny arms and sing at the top of my lungs, but I can guarantee that I’m having a better time than you are.

With all of that said, dear audience, I hope you don’t think that my words have been too harsh. I do not aim to insult, but rather to speak the truth in love. I am deeply committed to the power of rock music as a means of artistic expression, and I know that you are too. So please, let’s remember the reason we liked this stuff in the first place. Let’s get out of our seats and show the world that rock is not dead. It’s up to us.
               
                    Sincerely,
                    Jason Hardy